In December 2023 (for the post, “the sofa bed and sleepovers“), I did a tally of family and close friends from out of town that had visited me since I moved into my place in Montréal in February 2022. I landed on a count of 21, an average of one for each month. I will say now as I said then — that is how I like it (because, you know, those people, we have great times, long talks, long walks, I love them). In July of last year, I had my first cocktail party here, inviting to my place, for the first time, people I had met in Montréal. Hosting, bringing together acquaintances and new friends, is also something I like to do (because, you know, a good time is had by all, and if we’re lucky, some of those people eventually become close friends that I love). I had a last hurrah on January 1, 2024, knowing that it was about to be a no-go zone around here for most of this year (due to dental work spanning January to October, which has led to my significant retreat from social life).
So … no-go zone. No overnight guests (other of my daughters). No cocktail parties. Limited outings. Very little social interaction. At the beginning, not gonna lie, I was a bit loopy and found it painfully awkward (at times, also physically painful) to be in contact with anyone. There were some acrobatics of body, mind and spirit, for sure (as well as a spontaneous trek to the west coast).
But now, around the half-way mark of these nine months of relative reclusiveness, I’ve found a groove. Human adaptability is an interesting thing. The current no-go zone has led, for example, to more reading and I’m currently making my way through: a Giller Prize shortlist title from Kevin Chong; Jesse Wente’s best-seller, Unreconciled; and Music: A subversive history (I can recommend them all). My sleep hygiene has improved. The front garden is in better shape than it was last year. I’ve been going on solo outings that are more down-tempo than usual, like “La music qui fait vibrer Montréal” as part of the Centre Phi’s “Habitat Sonore: salle d’écoute” programming (which I can also recommend; the English version of the page is here). What I’ve noticed most, though, is the time to observe the moments of my life, to reflect, to contemplate (and I realise how much I value having time protected for and by stillness).
These things, I plan to keep, beyond the no-go zone.
That said, I very much miss old friends knocking at the door (although a handful of them have keys to my place, so they don’t actually need to knock). And I miss the new-friendships-in-the-making, here in Montréal, as I’ve kept myself at a distance, which has led me to feel (no surprise) distant.
In October, though, we are back on. Yo, out-of-town friends, pack your overnight bags. Lovely locals, see you soon.
Meantime, everyone, a toast to your health, to our collective health as a society, and to hopefulness for the coming days of summer.
a few words ... from Montréal 